It beggars belief

To my utter disgust I have recently discovered that "The Curious Case of Benjamin Butthole" has been nominated for not one, not two, but thirteen Oscars. I want to know what the Oscars committee is collectively smoking, because it seems to endow them with the incredible power to locate artistic excellence in a quagmire of mind- and ass-numbing mediocrity. The one saving grace of it all is that Meryl Streep and Viola Davis have been nominated for their astounding performances in Doubt. I don't know what it is about Meryl, but I would go straight for her; perhaps I just love her because she plays a great bitch. Speaking of which, if Benjamin Butthole even so much as wins "Best Catering on a Movie Set" I vow to bitch-slap myself until I'm red in the face.